Am I an easy target?

If you enjoy being fierce to me, I don’t enjoy it at all..

If you feel nothing about embarrassing me in front of ppl, I did feel something..

If you think I look so toot that I am an easy target for bully, you are wrong..

If you think I am in bad mood, am I? I just trying to be emotionless and lie low.. and being busy has given me the excuse to do that.. I think I never even show my true bad mood yet..

If you think I am just thinking too much, that means you are thinking too little.. have you ever think about what you have done? Maybe it is not your business at all.. why did I come near in the first place?

If you are feeling jealous, I can’t stop it.. as I am just being myself.. I am doing what I think is right and I have my ways.. and it’s just my fate and luck that I am what I am now..

If you did it on purpose to provoke me, to teach me a lesson, I think you succeeded.. I really did learn something.. I should not have become your "no choice".. I thought I am something, but seems like I am nothing to you.. I am thankful for all you have done for me, truely thankful.. you may not appreciate what I done at all.. and may not remember.. it is still my own choice.. nobody force me..

I am also sorry if my problems become your problems.. I just didn't know I am such a pain in the ass..

If you didn't keep my secrets at all, I don't blame you becos it is my own fault to disclose them to you.. but don't worry, I don't believe in taking revenge although my mind is telling me to do that.. I will not tell others what I know about you..

I should have listen to my parents and friends earlier.. I should have.. it’s too late now and I was too stubborn.. I believed that there were still some chances.. there should be.. but seems like I am wrong.. and seems like I just like to appear and do the wrong things at the wrong time.. maybe I am really toot..

I just so not used to the true cold and complicated human world.. maybe.. others feel the same way about me too.. not maybe.. high chance it will..

To all my friends out there, I really miss you..

Busy and tired but happy :)

yah.. my work has started to get more busy.. can't slack anymore yah.. more challenging and more exciting.. haha.. there are really so much things to learn now.. I just need to absorb as much as possible and do my things properly.. problems will most likely to have.. unavoidable.. so it will depend on how I handle them.. can't give up yah..

just had my birthday last sun.. not much of celebration.. my parents not in town.. went to malaysia for qing ming.. I never join them becos travel to and fro too tiring.. so stay in Singapore and went out with my friend.. this friend has been so nice yah.. willing to come out with me.. even though very busy and tired.. and gave me a movie treat.. haha.. thankz man.. you are a great friend!

anyway.. my parents not with me on my birthday but we had a dinner together on the thurs for a early birthday celebration.. haha.. with my vouchers, we ate at cafe swiss at swissotel.. to be honest, if we don't have the $120 vouchers, we will not be eating there.. I have tried my best to choose one of the lowest priced restaurant there.. but in the end I still need to top up $60.. haha.. so ex right.. there's fine dining mah with good services.. which all of us are not used to yah.. but at least the meal is filling.. delicious? okay lah.. except that my mum says the lamb is a bit tasteless without the sauce.. haha.. and my steak is a bit burnt.. the appetiser goose liver with apple not bad.. we first time ate goose liver leh.. so sua gu.. haha.. we called the set meal.. so everyone can order 2 dishes.. each of us ordered a main course: salmon fillet, steak and lamb.. in addition a appetiser, a minestrone soup and a chocolate cake dessert which we shared.. they also give free flow of breads.. I don't think we will go there again unless we have vouchers becos it is really too ex for the whole family.. but I heard citibank credit card has 50 % discount but don't know it is valid till when..

the happy family at dinner..

goose liver with apple..

My mum's salmon fillet..

my beef steak..

Lamb meat and my dad's big tummy.. haha..

Chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream and apricot

I want to thank all those who have wished me happy birthday thru sms, msn or facebook.. you are the ones who make me not feeling alone in this world.. and thankz for the presents.. no matter what they are, I will treasure them :)