I need to study harder!

many ppl have told me to study hard.. Profs whom I talked to for honours.. ivy from CSP.. my friends.. so stressed.. do I look that sort who don't study hard.. I am a nerd leh.. and I looked so nerdy last time.. now also bah.. maybe things have changed.. my attitude has changed.. I can't study without play now.. I am supposed to spend my time well studying today but I spent it writing blog.. what am I thinking leh..

I have to pull up my grades.. Prof hope that I do well in chemistry and get at least 4.0 so that I will be in good chance of getting second upper.. they are trying to give me good advice.. already got one prof made me embarrassed when telling him my grades one by one.. getting worse and worse each sem.. and he hinted to me that I am not good enough to be under him.. I am so sad lor.. why did I end up like this? ppl say I am in dean's list.. but that's long and long ago.. now no more.. I am so embarrassed when they talk about it lor.. I am so far from it now..

and if I don't pull up to 4.0.. I may be out of the CSP.. I cannot be out of it.. I am in the program for 3 years liao.. cannot stop now right..

no matter what.. I have to work hard and do well..