I feel my relationship with my parents is quite strained lor.. really don't know lah.. I really feel like I am chained to them like that.. not much freedom like that.. I am rebellious and not obedient at all.. but I should have passed my rebellious age already right but why still like that.. really really don't know.. so frustrating.. both of them are just treating me like a small girl like that.. but i'm 22 already.. maybe I not financially independent bah.. to make sure I don't do anything wrong.. I will ask them to make sure but my mum will scold me and say why can't I make the decision myself.. ask and don't ask will get scolded.. I really don't know what to do.. I always thought that getting a job in the holiday is not impt but now I feel I must get one.. becos I want to buy stuff.. maybe now I spent more liao bah.. but during the sem.. I didn't even spend much de lor.. only during the hol.. but when my mum see I spend more.. she will nag and nag and don't let me buy things.. so frustrating.. how can she be like that? I am really not happy..
I really think that my parents are in their menopause period.. very easily get angry and talk loudly.. always accusing me of doing things that I never do.. and as a impatient person who hate been accused wrongly, I will shout back at them and argue with them.. and the argument get heated up.. everybody becomes very very angry.. I know as their daughter I should control myself more.. I should not be so rude.. but I just cannot control lor.. becos they are my parents.. can't they treat me well and they should be the ones who understand me better.. how can they accuse me of stuff that I did not do.. although it is something minor.. I just can't accept.. and I am not the sort who can bear everything.. I am a very direct person.. everything will burst out of me.. and we really have generation gap.. and some of their thinkings really are something I cannot accept lor.. and some of their comments I also cannot accept.. I really cannot stomach everything lor.. and keep quiet all the time.. that's really not me..
sometime I have "evil" thoughts that I want to run away from them lor.. stay away from them but they are my parents.. and they only have me as their child.. I cannot leave them alone.. I think I also cannot bear to do that to them.. maybe I am used to rely on them liao lor.. what a dilemma right.. so used to them making decisions for me.. maybe I have taken it for granted.. but I really feel so trapped in this situation.. can someone help me?
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
I'm a bad girl.. Yes, I am..
Posted by
Steph
at
1:33 PM
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